Who The Fuck Are You People?
July 8, 2009
There’s some kind of motherfucking meme crap going on, and DoucheMonkey has strongarmed me into participating. As Ed “Not Exactly Motherfucking Rocket Science” Yong put it:
Identify yourself in the comments. Even if you’ve never commented before, speak up. Who are you?
So I say to my readers, speak the fuck up and tell us who you are, what is your dealio, and why are you here?
July 8, 2009 at 10:14 am
I’m another scientist, not a physiologist, who is here to get inspiration, view other perspectives, maybe learn some science, exchange some political ideas.
July 8, 2009 at 10:56 am
I am a PhD candidate engineer, and I’m here to broaden my mind, learn from others, yada, yada….
mostly because I enjoy blogging and reading and goofing off at work.
July 8, 2009 at 11:18 am
I’m not a scientist, just a science groupie. I’m here because my job isn’t challenging or time-consuming, I’m bored, someone at another science blog linked to you, and it’s your turn in the list of science blogs I check out every day.
July 8, 2009 at 11:21 am
Nobody interesting. I took the early-escape-with-a-masters route out of grad school last year so I could work as an EMT (a spectacularly awful job for anyone with a brain, I am so bored I want to kill myself) and continue waffling about whether to go to med school as I’ve been doing for the last six years. I probably came here from some med blog, I stay for your fabulously inventive vocabulary.
July 8, 2009 at 11:38 am
I’m a post-doctoral biologist at a federal agency, a mother, an atheist, and a bonerkilling feminazi. I came to you through your guest blogging gig at Feministing (or was it Feministe?) and was drawn to your unapologetic use of foul language.
July 8, 2009 at 12:04 pm
I’m a blogger, and I say fuck quite often. Everyone needs a hobby, you see.
July 8, 2009 at 12:17 pm
I just like all the pretty words! <3<3<3<3<3
July 8, 2009 at 12:23 pm
I started reading when the fucking knitters were making your ass a hat, sheesh, it’s been a while.
July 8, 2009 at 12:51 pm
I drifted too close to a singularity and was sucked into the CPP vortex. My vocabulary has fucking degraded severely and the shields are fucking failing.
Barring a miracle, I am toast. Thus ends the search for the answer to the meme.
I am toast.
July 8, 2009 at 12:53 pm
oops, that should be my fucking vocabulary has fucking degraded severely and the fucking shields are fucking failing…
July 8, 2009 at 1:11 pm
I’m just a little ol’ card-carrying abortionlovinmuslimofascist who pretty much agrees with everything PP has posted; except that I also happen to think the NY Yank-me’s are a bunch of over-paid, underachieving goat-fuckers.
July 8, 2009 at 1:16 pm
Oh, and I also work assisting people with disabilities be successful in community living. Just sucklin’ off the guvmint teat, dontcha know.
July 8, 2009 at 2:15 pm
I remain a faithful disciple because PhysioProf teaches me important words like “fucktillion” and “doucherocketry.” I refuse, however, to ever refer to him as “Comrade.”
July 8, 2009 at 3:01 pm
I’m a communist/atheist/jew/southern/slut/book-loving/feminist/pill-popping/angry/fat/middle-aged/smoking/drinking/cursing/bread-winning/lonely/frustrated/bitch/half-dead/mother and nurse. Not exactly June Cleaver. Not even close.
I am also very shy and very sensitive.
Your blog is the first blog I ever read. I was reading you long before I ever so much as clicked on my partner’s blog (Coturnix). Your blog opened my eyes. I would never have guessed that there is someone out there who shares my affinity, my slavish devotion, my commitment, my deep and abiding love for the word “fuck.”
I read you because you are a FUCKING GENIUS and a really decent human being. When I read you, I feel like I am not alone in the world. You make me laugh when I feel like slitting my fucking throat.
Thank you for writing.
July 8, 2009 at 3:07 pm
I wandered over here from I Blame the Patriarchy. I stay for the cursing. And the Yankees love.
July 8, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Phd Student and mom who is not ashamed to admit her frequent use of the work “fuck” resulted in it being her childs first work.
And now he watches hockey on tv and yells Fuck! FUCK FUCK! like all Canadian boys.
July 8, 2009 at 3:34 pm
Your blog is the first blog I ever read. I was reading you long before I ever so much as clicked on my partner’s blog
I am staring in utter, jaw-dropping, motherfucking disbelief at this statement. wow.
/blink, blink, blink
July 8, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Toaster is not a toaster. I’m a scientist instead.
I’m not exactly sure why I keep dropping by here. Must be entertaining or some shit like that…
July 8, 2009 at 4:47 pm
I’m a postdoc in physiology. I read your blog because it’s fucking awesome.
July 8, 2009 at 4:51 pm
My name is Frau Matron and I come from a cold, cold microscopy lab daily to commiserate about mutual sports interests and obtain guidance from a most interesting mentor, bar none.
July 8, 2009 at 4:59 pm
Just a fan who enjoys your commentary.
Although, I doubt you’ll see my comment because I am a Red Sox fan.
July 8, 2009 at 5:41 pm
I am a fourth-year medical student who also loves the word fuck and am absolutely enamored of CPP’s no-holds-barred feminism. Teh sports, not so much.
July 8, 2009 at 6:00 pm
Neuroscience postdoc. Here because I feel like it.
July 8, 2009 at 6:01 pm
Oh! And a Yankees fan in Boston.
July 8, 2009 at 6:36 pm
Former long-long-LONG-term card-carrying kool-aid-drinking psychiatry-hating billion-year-contract-signing Scientologist who quit, got my shit together, went to college, got a science degree and was going to go to grad school and be a scientist and then decided fuck it, I’m too old to be spending -another- six to ten years broke and in slavery.
I came here probably because some science blog linked to you. I stayed because you crack my ass up and you’re powered by motherfucking Jameson. I could give a shit about most sports most of the time and rarely know what you’re talking about, but I admire your enthusiasm. When I -do- know what you’re talking about, it’s always worth reading or usually worth following the link, so you’re on my daily blog rotation.
July 8, 2009 at 7:44 pm
I’m a PhD student in molecular biology who hopes to graduate sometime this century. I found you through the feministe guest blog thingie. Your copious amounts of cursing have inspired me to unclench and let loose a little on my own blog.
July 8, 2009 at 8:14 pm
I am Kim Wombles, an adjunct instructor of English and psychology at a community college who absofrakkinglutely loves the versatility with which you use the word fuck. I eagerly await each new blog to see what new usage will be employed.
I quote you on my own blog, and my all-time favorite quote of anyone ever will always be your: “i don’t give a fuck if i bore people. i just expect them to walk away if they are bored. i’m certainly not going to shut the fuck up.” That is and remains fraktaculously awesome.
July 8, 2009 at 9:05 pm
I’m a chemistry grad student. I wandered over here to get more foul mouthed rants than I could from just reading you on DrugMonkey, but I stayed for the drunken Yankees celebrations.
July 8, 2009 at 9:41 pm
Middle School science teacher. In Arkansas.
Came for the science commentary, stay because CPP’s Fuckspeak slightly reduces the barely controllable urge to swear at my eighth graders, even though I make every effort to use ‘fucktillion,’ ‘eleventy’ and ‘douchenozzle’ in common speech. I’m bringing Rantallion back too.
Also, tips such as why we should be reading Behind the Stick.
July 8, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Fuck you people!
Since i’m not a fan of excessive copypasta and I’m tired of finding new ways to word this a list:
I am:
– Canadian. Although I was born on a different continent.
– an undergrad studying neuroscience
– an atheist
I like:
– “PhysioProf’s creative use of naughty words”
I hate:
– baseball and most other forms of sport-as-entertainment
July 8, 2009 at 9:59 pm
61 year fucking old atheist electronics instructor, I know I should be retired from this shit but I do like to listen to myself talk. I come here for fucking respite from ignorance and complacency.
Sometimes you make me wonder why I fucking bother but sometimes you make me fucking smile, might even get a guffaw, which is fucking cool!
July 8, 2009 at 10:38 pm
a fucking logician who likes your posts and your most excellent fucking vocabulary!
July 8, 2009 at 11:20 pm
I sense a kindred spirit in the copious use of the word “fuck” – like a longshoreman with Tourette’s. Despite the obvious character flaw of rooting for the Yankees, I find you smart & entertaining.
July 9, 2009 at 12:29 am
I’m a postdoc, and I read you because I know that deep down, in the darkest reaches of your soul, you just love widdle puddy-tats.
July 9, 2009 at 12:53 am
I come here because I like you. I am a Chick with a PhizzleDizzle (allllllmost). Oh, in computer science.
July 9, 2009 at 4:35 am
MSc materials science from Germany, that’s why I like to capitalze words all the friggin’ Time. Goofing off at work to kill time, impressed by the fucktillion possibilites to use the word “ficken” for neologisms. Dissapointed that we Huns do not have an equivalent for “douchenozzle”. Ahhh…and I think American cars and sports suck elephant dick. Especially basefuckingball. And the Crankies suckk more than any other team on the fucking face of the fucking earth.
Ficken!
July 9, 2009 at 6:52 am
I’m a political scientist – I initially found your blog while reading FSP, PiT, etc.. (At first I was surprised by the profanity in some of the comments I to their posts but I quickly grew to recognize that it was all from CPP and now I think you are fucking awesome.)
July 9, 2009 at 8:19 am
I’m a motherfuckin clinical research coordinator, struggling with motherfuckin bipolar disorder or some such crazy shit. I read here because it cheers me the fuck up.
July 9, 2009 at 9:17 am
I just hang around waiting for the loons to show up..
July 9, 2009 at 11:13 am
I’m a PhD candidate in a biology dept. I read two scientist’s blogs. Yours and FSP’s. I enjoy the colorful contrasts.
July 9, 2009 at 11:41 am
I peek out of the lab every now and then to read your blog and stay for the fucking hilarity.
July 9, 2009 at 1:39 pm
I’m here to bask in the NIH glow with my shades on. And because I loathe the Republican right. I stay to laugh at Yankee pitching and, like others, to expand my vocabulary.
July 9, 2009 at 4:49 pm
Take Catharine’s description and:
-Subtract Southern, older, lonely, mother, “yours was the first blog I read”
-Add super fabulous, activist, queer, musician, glassblower, artist
-Throw in a B.A. in anthropology, a strong interest in medical anthro and a likely career in public health.
I found you through IBTP. I am wont to be a lurker on most blogs but I try to comment when I’ve got something to say. Stalker-y fact: I keep a running list of words with which you have enriched my vocabulary (e.g., “fuckwastrel,” “douchescrote” and “assmonger”).
July 9, 2009 at 5:30 pm
I have no idea why I come here but I just keep coming back…
Of course that’s not true, Prof, and you know it. Since you were my mentor in starting this blogging stuff and the nexus to people I never in a million tears would’ve come in contact with, I come here out of gratitude, out of loyalty, out of a desire now and then to learn, of course to be entertained, and to count the number of “fucks” per sentence per post. You hold the record!
July 9, 2009 at 8:13 pm
scientist.
i like your social.political commentary.
July 10, 2009 at 12:05 am
I am an artist and filmmaker turned PhD candidate in evolutionary biology.
I like to smoke cannabis flowers and talk to god.
July 10, 2009 at 8:37 am
And a complete loon, Isabel…don’t forget that part.
July 10, 2009 at 12:52 pm
Nobody in particular. Followed you back here from Belle’s place. Read you on my feed reader thanks to work web filter. That’s pretty much it.
July 10, 2009 at 3:53 pm
Come here to laugh at the edutards who spent allot of money to have letters added to there names when in reality they should have only had to spend a fraction to work in the field of there choosing. Thus are the requirements of society. HS grad who runs his own business and can commiserate with the baffling questions that CPP brings to life. Also waiting for CPP’s next addition to the slap the stupid person dictionary. Late.
July 10, 2009 at 6:15 pm
Fuck you, bikemonkey.
If you haven’t caught on yet, that was a JOKE, and it’s been over oh, three months or so.
July 11, 2009 at 1:55 am
I am a PhD student in a large highly ranked cancer center in the south. I am a new reader though I’ve enjoyed your comments on some of the other science blogs I read (DrIsis,FSP…).
July 11, 2009 at 7:12 pm
i am a neuropharmamotherfuckingcologist with a few weeks left in grad school and a narrow specialization on some subtypes of shit that make people act and think more like idiots than usual. i fucking hate everyone and everything, and the whole motherfucking world can kiss my dissertation-writing, postdoc-lab-interviewing, flying-around-the-country-when-i-don’t-really-have-the-time-to, experiment-finishing ass.
but i stop by now and then for the entertainment.
July 11, 2009 at 8:14 pm
Landed on your blog from feministe or feministing (can’t remember which one), a while back … I don’t blog, I read interesting blogs instead
Feminist animal loving Indian guy settled with my lovely partner in Indiana.
July 12, 2009 at 12:48 am
Attorney litigating water law in California. Radical lefty, former vegetarian, bicycle transportation crank.
July 12, 2009 at 11:24 am
Geologist by education, “at home” parent by occupation. Feminist, liberal, swearing enthusiast.
July 12, 2009 at 10:29 pm
I am shocked by the pervasive use of the ‘f’ word on this site as well as the many other vulgarisms that are found here. I return because it’s oddly exciting and makes me tingle in odd places, this being one of the oddest. Could you please grow up and learn to express yourself in a more mature manner so I won’t have to return here anymore? Thank you.
July 13, 2009 at 3:43 am
PhD student – Australia. Fish and stuff. I have no idea why I read blogs. But yours is funny.
July 14, 2009 at 2:04 pm
Post-doc, virology, cancer and B-cells.
I like ‘eleventy’. You might use the word ‘fuck’ more than my boss and I combined. You tell it like it is.
I’m powered by girly vodka. So you are basically a diesel, I’m a hybrid.
July 15, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Came here from IBTP, share many of your attributes, am entertained and amused. What more do you need to know, really.