Who The Fuck Are You People?

July 8, 2009

There’s some kind of motherfucking meme crap going on, and DoucheMonkey has strongarmed me into participating. As Ed “Not Exactly Motherfucking Rocket Science” Yong put it:

Identify yourself in the comments. Even if you’ve never commented before, speak up. Who are you?

So I say to my readers, speak the fuck up and tell us who you are, what is your dealio, and why are you here?

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61 Responses to “Who The Fuck Are You People?”

  1. BB Says:

    I’m another scientist, not a physiologist, who is here to get inspiration, view other perspectives, maybe learn some science, exchange some political ideas.

  2. Miss Outlier Says:

    I am a PhD candidate engineer, and I’m here to broaden my mind, learn from others, yada, yada….

    mostly because I enjoy blogging and reading and goofing off at work.

  3. cicely Says:

    I’m not a scientist, just a science groupie. I’m here because my job isn’t challenging or time-consuming, I’m bored, someone at another science blog linked to you, and it’s your turn in the list of science blogs I check out every day.

  4. Katie Says:

    Nobody interesting. I took the early-escape-with-a-masters route out of grad school last year so I could work as an EMT (a spectacularly awful job for anyone with a brain, I am so bored I want to kill myself) and continue waffling about whether to go to med school as I’ve been doing for the last six years. I probably came here from some med blog, I stay for your fabulously inventive vocabulary.

  5. Complain-o-peeps Says:

    I’m a post-doctoral biologist at a federal agency, a mother, an atheist, and a bonerkilling feminazi. I came to you through your guest blogging gig at Feministing (or was it Feministe?) and was drawn to your unapologetic use of foul language.

  6. tata Says:

    I’m a blogger, and I say fuck quite often. Everyone needs a hobby, you see.

  7. random passersby Says:

    I just like all the pretty words! <3<3<3<3<3

  8. jc Says:

    I started reading when the fucking knitters were making your ass a hat, sheesh, it’s been a while.

  9. rehctaw Says:

    I drifted too close to a singularity and was sucked into the CPP vortex. My vocabulary has fucking degraded severely and the shields are fucking failing.

    Barring a miracle, I am toast. Thus ends the search for the answer to the meme.

    I am toast.

  10. rehctaw Says:

    oops, that should be my fucking vocabulary has fucking degraded severely and the fucking shields are fucking failing…

  11. bikelib Says:

    I’m just a little ol’ card-carrying abortionlovinmuslimofascist who pretty much agrees with everything PP has posted; except that I also happen to think the NY Yank-me’s are a bunch of over-paid, underachieving goat-fuckers.

  12. bikelib Says:

    Oh, and I also work assisting people with disabilities be successful in community living. Just sucklin’ off the guvmint teat, dontcha know.


  13. I remain a faithful disciple because PhysioProf teaches me important words like “fucktillion” and “doucherocketry.” I refuse, however, to ever refer to him as “Comrade.”

  14. Catharine Says:

    I’m a communist/atheist/jew/southern/slut/book-loving/feminist/pill-popping/angry/fat/middle-aged/smoking/drinking/cursing/bread-winning/lonely/frustrated/bitch/half-dead/mother and nurse. Not exactly June Cleaver. Not even close.

    I am also very shy and very sensitive.

    Your blog is the first blog I ever read. I was reading you long before I ever so much as clicked on my partner’s blog (Coturnix). Your blog opened my eyes. I would never have guessed that there is someone out there who shares my affinity, my slavish devotion, my commitment, my deep and abiding love for the word “fuck.”

    I read you because you are a FUCKING GENIUS and a really decent human being. When I read you, I feel like I am not alone in the world. You make me laugh when I feel like slitting my fucking throat.

    Thank you for writing.

  15. Wolfhound Says:

    I wandered over here from I Blame the Patriarchy. I stay for the cursing. And the Yankees love.


  16. Phd Student and mom who is not ashamed to admit her frequent use of the work “fuck” resulted in it being her childs first work.

    And now he watches hockey on tv and yells Fuck! FUCK FUCK! like all Canadian boys.

  17. drugmonkey Says:

    Your blog is the first blog I ever read. I was reading you long before I ever so much as clicked on my partner’s blog

    I am staring in utter, jaw-dropping, motherfucking disbelief at this statement. wow.

    /blink, blink, blink

  18. Toaster Says:

    Toaster is not a toaster. I’m a scientist instead.

    I’m not exactly sure why I keep dropping by here. Must be entertaining or some shit like that…

  19. postdoc Says:

    I’m a postdoc in physiology. I read your blog because it’s fucking awesome.


  20. My name is Frau Matron and I come from a cold, cold microscopy lab daily to commiserate about mutual sports interests and obtain guidance from a most interesting mentor, bar none.

  21. John Says:

    Just a fan who enjoys your commentary.

    Although, I doubt you’ll see my comment because I am a Red Sox fan.

  22. Phledge Says:

    I am a fourth-year medical student who also loves the word fuck and am absolutely enamored of CPP’s no-holds-barred feminism. Teh sports, not so much.

  23. Physiogroupie IV Says:

    Neuroscience postdoc. Here because I feel like it. 🙂

  24. Physiogroupie IV Says:

    Oh! And a Yankees fan in Boston.

  25. Pennsylvaniac Says:

    Former long-long-LONG-term card-carrying kool-aid-drinking psychiatry-hating billion-year-contract-signing Scientologist who quit, got my shit together, went to college, got a science degree and was going to go to grad school and be a scientist and then decided fuck it, I’m too old to be spending -another- six to ten years broke and in slavery.

    I came here probably because some science blog linked to you. I stayed because you crack my ass up and you’re powered by motherfucking Jameson. I could give a shit about most sports most of the time and rarely know what you’re talking about, but I admire your enthusiasm. When I -do- know what you’re talking about, it’s always worth reading or usually worth following the link, so you’re on my daily blog rotation.

  26. queenrandom Says:

    I’m a PhD student in molecular biology who hopes to graduate sometime this century. I found you through the feministe guest blog thingie. Your copious amounts of cursing have inspired me to unclench and let loose a little on my own blog.

  27. KWombles Says:

    I am Kim Wombles, an adjunct instructor of English and psychology at a community college who absofrakkinglutely loves the versatility with which you use the word fuck. I eagerly await each new blog to see what new usage will be employed.

    I quote you on my own blog, and my all-time favorite quote of anyone ever will always be your: “i don’t give a fuck if i bore people. i just expect them to walk away if they are bored. i’m certainly not going to shut the fuck up.” That is and remains fraktaculously awesome.

  28. Dennis Says:

    I’m a chemistry grad student. I wandered over here to get more foul mouthed rants than I could from just reading you on DrugMonkey, but I stayed for the drunken Yankees celebrations.

  29. Mr. Says:

    Middle School science teacher. In Arkansas.

    Came for the science commentary, stay because CPP’s Fuckspeak slightly reduces the barely controllable urge to swear at my eighth graders, even though I make every effort to use ‘fucktillion,’ ‘eleventy’ and ‘douchenozzle’ in common speech. I’m bringing Rantallion back too.

    Also, tips such as why we should be reading Behind the Stick.

  30. LostMarbles Says:

    Fuck you people!

    Since i’m not a fan of excessive copypasta and I’m tired of finding new ways to word this a list:

    I am:
    – Canadian. Although I was born on a different continent.
    – an undergrad studying neuroscience
    – an atheist

    I like:
    – “PhysioProf’s creative use of naughty words”

    I hate:
    – baseball and most other forms of sport-as-entertainment

  31. Pat Says:

    61 year fucking old atheist electronics instructor, I know I should be retired from this shit but I do like to listen to myself talk. I come here for fucking respite from ignorance and complacency.
    Sometimes you make me wonder why I fucking bother but sometimes you make me fucking smile, might even get a guffaw, which is fucking cool!

  32. Debbie Says:

    a fucking logician who likes your posts and your most excellent fucking vocabulary!


  33. I sense a kindred spirit in the copious use of the word “fuck” – like a longshoreman with Tourette’s. Despite the obvious character flaw of rooting for the Yankees, I find you smart & entertaining.


  34. I’m a postdoc, and I read you because I know that deep down, in the darkest reaches of your soul, you just love widdle puddy-tats.


  35. I come here because I like you. I am a Chick with a PhizzleDizzle (allllllmost). Oh, in computer science.

  36. Gluecypher Says:

    MSc materials science from Germany, that’s why I like to capitalze words all the friggin’ Time. Goofing off at work to kill time, impressed by the fucktillion possibilites to use the word “ficken” for neologisms. Dissapointed that we Huns do not have an equivalent for “douchenozzle”. Ahhh…and I think American cars and sports suck elephant dick. Especially basefuckingball. And the Crankies suckk more than any other team on the fucking face of the fucking earth.

    Ficken!

  37. Requin Says:

    I’m a political scientist – I initially found your blog while reading FSP, PiT, etc.. (At first I was surprised by the profanity in some of the comments I to their posts but I quickly grew to recognize that it was all from CPP and now I think you are fucking awesome.)

  38. Superla Says:

    I’m a motherfuckin clinical research coordinator, struggling with motherfuckin bipolar disorder or some such crazy shit. I read here because it cheers me the fuck up.

  39. bikemonkey Says:

    I just hang around waiting for the loons to show up..

  40. jojo Says:

    I’m a PhD candidate in a biology dept. I read two scientist’s blogs. Yours and FSP’s. I enjoy the colorful contrasts. 🙂

  41. Physiobabe Says:

    I peek out of the lab every now and then to read your blog and stay for the fucking hilarity.


  42. I’m here to bask in the NIH glow with my shades on. And because I loathe the Republican right. I stay to laugh at Yankee pitching and, like others, to expand my vocabulary.

  43. Bi Avenger Says:

    Take Catharine’s description and:
    -Subtract Southern, older, lonely, mother, “yours was the first blog I read”
    -Add super fabulous, activist, queer, musician, glassblower, artist
    -Throw in a B.A. in anthropology, a strong interest in medical anthro and a likely career in public health.

    I found you through IBTP. I am wont to be a lurker on most blogs but I try to comment when I’ve got something to say. Stalker-y fact: I keep a running list of words with which you have enriched my vocabulary (e.g., “fuckwastrel,” “douchescrote” and “assmonger”).

  44. scribbler50 Says:

    I have no idea why I come here but I just keep coming back…
    Of course that’s not true, Prof, and you know it. Since you were my mentor in starting this blogging stuff and the nexus to people I never in a million tears would’ve come in contact with, I come here out of gratitude, out of loyalty, out of a desire now and then to learn, of course to be entertained, and to count the number of “fucks” per sentence per post. You hold the record!

  45. pinus Says:

    scientist.
    i like your social.political commentary.

  46. Isabel Says:

    I am an artist and filmmaker turned PhD candidate in evolutionary biology.

    I like to smoke cannabis flowers and talk to god.

  47. bikemonkey Says:

    And a complete loon, Isabel…don’t forget that part.

  48. Ethyl Says:

    Nobody in particular. Followed you back here from Belle’s place. Read you on my feed reader thanks to work web filter. That’s pretty much it.

  49. bustedsbro Says:

    Come here to laugh at the edutards who spent allot of money to have letters added to there names when in reality they should have only had to spend a fraction to work in the field of there choosing. Thus are the requirements of society. HS grad who runs his own business and can commiserate with the baffling questions that CPP brings to life. Also waiting for CPP’s next addition to the slap the stupid person dictionary. Late.

  50. Isabel Says:

    Fuck you, bikemonkey.

    If you haven’t caught on yet, that was a JOKE, and it’s been over oh, three months or so.

  51. Angela Says:

    I am a PhD student in a large highly ranked cancer center in the south. I am a new reader though I’ve enjoyed your comments on some of the other science blogs I read (DrIsis,FSP…).

  52. leigh Says:

    i am a neuropharmamotherfuckingcologist with a few weeks left in grad school and a narrow specialization on some subtypes of shit that make people act and think more like idiots than usual. i fucking hate everyone and everything, and the whole motherfucking world can kiss my dissertation-writing, postdoc-lab-interviewing, flying-around-the-country-when-i-don’t-really-have-the-time-to, experiment-finishing ass.

    but i stop by now and then for the entertainment.

  53. AG Says:

    Landed on your blog from feministe or feministing (can’t remember which one), a while back … I don’t blog, I read interesting blogs instead 🙂 Feminist animal loving Indian guy settled with my lovely partner in Indiana.

  54. danthelawyer Says:

    Attorney litigating water law in California. Radical lefty, former vegetarian, bicycle transportation crank.

  55. sandy Says:

    Geologist by education, “at home” parent by occupation. Feminist, liberal, swearing enthusiast.

  56. Discombob Says:

    I am shocked by the pervasive use of the ‘f’ word on this site as well as the many other vulgarisms that are found here. I return because it’s oddly exciting and makes me tingle in odd places, this being one of the oddest. Could you please grow up and learn to express yourself in a more mature manner so I won’t have to return here anymore? Thank you.

  57. Anonymous Says:

    PhD student – Australia. Fish and stuff. I have no idea why I read blogs. But yours is funny.

  58. Geeka Says:

    Post-doc, virology, cancer and B-cells.

    I like ‘eleventy’. You might use the word ‘fuck’ more than my boss and I combined. You tell it like it is.

    I’m powered by girly vodka. So you are basically a diesel, I’m a hybrid.

  59. Narya Says:

    Came here from IBTP, share many of your attributes, am entertained and amused. What more do you need to know, really.

  60. anon Says:

    Who I am is none of your fuckin business. I don’t know who the fuck you are, so we’re even. Generic neuroscientist. I like to say stuff sometimes, contribute to the conversation in a meaningful way, and the anonymity seems to make it more fun. It probably also gives people who don’t normally speak up in groups like this a bit more of a voice.


  61. […] by my ScienceBlogs colleagues [Ed, DrugMonkey, SciCurious, Janet Stemwedel, ScienceWomen, Coturnix, PhysioProf, Isis the Scientist, and now, a growing group of science-y and academic blogs that are off-site, […]


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