I Love Professional Sports, But…
December 23, 2009
I love sports, and it makes me fucking sick the way professional sports teams, leagues, and–most vomit-inducing–pampered teevee blitherers tie themselves to the Troops (TM) like a motherfucking string of tin cans clanking along the road behind the car of a newlywed couple. Mike and Mike are the absolute fucking worst with their slavering gun-sniffing.
It’s the same thing with latching on to “disease awareness” crapola. Mike and Mike make a huge fucking dealio every year about Coaches for Cancer and blather on and on endlessly about how important it is for their listeners to support this charity.
A couple years back, this Coaches for Cancer shit was going on right at exactly the same time that the United States Congress was debating the Health and Human Services appropriations bill, and whether to increase NIH funding, which includes the National Cancer Institute. I sent an e-mail to Mike and Mike explaining that the entire research budget of Coaches for Cancer is a pittance compared to the potential NCI increase that was being debated in the Congress, and that if they really cared about cancer research, they should exhort their listeners to call their Congresspeople and tell them that they are in favor of the NIH budget increase.
Do you think they even for one fucking second considered doing this, or that I even received a reply to my e-mail? Fuck no. Because they don’t give a single fucking shit about cancer, or the troops, or anyfuckingthing other than self-righteously aggrandizing themselves about “making a difference”.
The National Cancer Institute doesn’t invite teevee douchebags to some rubber chicken dinner event where they can show their greasy ugly mugs on teevee yet again with some hoodwinked sick little kid looking up at them worshipfully, and so they don’t give a single flying fuck.
I love professional sports, but I fucking hate the douchebag teevee motherfuckers and the nasty-ass sleazy corporate marketing garbaggio associated with it.
(h/t Ed, for riling me up.